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May 1, 2003
Question
I have been trying desperately to keep the light shining brightly on my spiritual path. Why is it so difficult sometimes? I know the "right" things to do; the most inspirational books to read; the healthiest diet; the most helpful visualizations, etc. I seem to ignore my highest priorities on a regular basis. What's wrong with me?
Answer
Nothing is wrong with you - you are human. It is sometimes quite difficult to combine our intellect and our spiritual needs in a balanced fashion. Knowing the right things to do doesn't make it easy. In fact, for some, it makes it seem more difficult. You spend lots of time in guilt and frustration about that dimly lit spiritual path. You do work very hard, and you need to accept the fact that it will occasionally seem difficult. We are here to evolve, to grow, to understand our own spirits. Try being very kind to yourself. Forgive yourself on a daily basis if necessary, and continue to allow your gentle, powerful spirit to light the path. Accept being human and enjoy being a loving spirit.
Question
I am married 11 yrs, have a 5 year old and a baby coming in March - both children wanted very much. I go back and forth on wanting to stay with my husband. He is a great father. I feel no real passion in our relationship and it seems more like a platonic partnership. We don't fight but share very little except for the love of our son. That is our bond - our child. I want more and know marriage can be fulfilling. It seems like work making this marriage work. We did counseling years ago. This has been an on-going theme with me since we were married. I don't want to hurt my children with a divorce. That is my biggest fear - it keeps me in limbo. Help me understand this please.
Answer
For now, please take good care of yourself and enjoy that new baby. Feel free to contact me again and I can do a more thorough read of your energies.
It's difficult enough to sort through marital problems without trying to do it while you're pregnant. I agree with you, however, that there is little connection between you and your husband at this time. I don't believe divorce right now would be wise for you or anyone involved. Why not try to get through the spring and then look more closely at your commitment to your husband. Remember that passion tends to ebb and flow in every relationship but you need to be able to depend on the energy flow.
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